You've done some thinking but I think you're a tad over emphasizing some points.
Go out and do 900 hours of SPIFR, then 900 hours of two pilot IFR, plus @500 hours of IFR training to include sim time. Get a desktop sim, it'll keep the thinking going.
You'll figure it all out once you get over the idea the second pilot is nothing more than a seat warmer. How you utilize the second brain on board is the trick. Ego needn't apply!
It's all what you make it, and, luck can and will run out if you don't stick to your standards, and, especially checklist routines as appropriate - this really will keep you in the safety window; start winging it and it's just a matter of time before the wrong sequence of events hurts you.
Lowest takeoff standard I've had was 'sufficient visibility to maintain VFR landback capability as required prior to undertaking IMC', and the lowest approach requirement '600' RVR or equivalent - to a rig'. The takeoff standard was single pilot or two pilot, the approach standard two pilot.
Thunderstorms? Go around them, and be careful about hail shaffts. Icing? if you don't have the equipment to do it, don't even think about going near it, ever. Icing is so unpredictable you can fly in similar cool/cold conditions 500 times and not see ice, and nubmer 501 will absolutely kill you, althought the reports leading up to takeoff are well inside the safety window.
Keep thinking. Don't let you guard down, ever. Retirement is very much fun.